'Can You Remotely Unjam My Printer?': The Tech Support Request That Defies Physics
If you’ve ever been the “techy” friend, you know the routine: your phone buzzes with another “urgent” request, your Discord lights up with a plea, or your family group chat explodes in panic over a blue screen or a mysteriously missing file. But perhaps nothing strikes terror—or induces as many eye rolls—as the phrase: “Hey, can you help me with my printer?”
But what happens when that plea comes with an extra twist: “Can you unjam my printer… remotely?”
When Quantum Computing Meets Printer Problems
In a recent gem from the r/TalesFromTechSupport subreddit, user u/AnDanDan shared a story that’s as relatable as it is ridiculous. The setup: a late-night Discord call, a friend with a tangled-up Brother printer, and a request that sounds one part genuine, two parts trolling.
“Uh, hey AnDanDan? Can you help me unjam a printer?” chirped the friend, reportedly in a joking tone. If you’ve ever led someone through the labyrinthine world of printer support by phone or chat, you can practically hear the collective groan that rippled through the server.
AnDanDan’s response? “I will kill you in real life.” (Don’t worry—it was all in jest, but if you’ve ever spent hours on the phone with someone trying to describe a blinking orange light, you get it.)
The Printer Jam: A Tech Support Rite of Passage
Printer jams are the great equalizer: it doesn’t matter if you’re a digital neophyte or a quantum computing wizard (as AnDanDan’s friend apparently is—they work with quantum computers!), you will, at some point, be humbled by a $70 inkjet’s stubborn refusal to spit out your document.
In this case, the friend had run out of letter paper, so they fed in legal paper but didn’t bother to switch the printer settings. Predictably, the “greedy bastard” (AnDanDan’s words, not mine) yanked not one, but two sheets at once—triggering the paper jam from hell.
But unlike the average “printer is possessed” user, this friend wasn’t totally at sea. With a little video call magic and a dash of patience, AnDanDan was able to get the model number, pull up the official guide, and walk the friend through the time-honored tradition of “pull this panel, check that compartment, and—yes—pop off the back and fish out the mangled paper.”
Crisis averted, with minimal blood pressure spikes.
The Limits of Remote Support (and Friendship)
There’s something both hilarious and mildly terrifying about the idea of remote printer repair. In an age where we can beam our faces across the world, control thermostats via smartphone, and even remotely update our cars’ software, there’s still no way to reach through the screen and physically unjam a printer for someone.
And yet, that doesn’t stop friends, family, or well-meaning coworkers from asking. “Can you unjam it… from there?” they’ll ask, as if you’re about to don a virtual wrench and crawl through the Ethernet cable.
It’s as if, deep down, everyone still believes the “computer people” are just a little bit magical—that maybe, just maybe, you know a secret incantation (“Have you tried turning it off and on again?”) or a well-hidden Windows setting that will make the jam vanish.
Why Printer Troubles Are the True Test of Friendship
Let’s be honest: printers are the final boss of tech support. They’re mechanical, finicky, and notoriously uncommunicative (“Paper jam in tray 1”—but which tray is tray 1, and why are there seventeen levers inside?). Walking someone through unjamming a printer is the tech support equivalent of defusing a bomb with a 5-second delay and instructions in another language.
So, when AnDanDan’s friend asked for help—even half-jokingly—it wasn’t just a plea for tech support. It was an act of trust, and maybe a little mischief.
And the fact that the solution was found together—one person guiding, the other following, both probably laughing at the absurdity—reminds us why we put up with these requests in the first place. It’s about helping, connecting, and, yes, maybe having a good story to share on Reddit afterward.
The Takeaway: Next Time, Buy Extra Paper (or Better Friends)
The next time someone asks you to perform remote printer surgery, take a deep breath, suppress the urge to groan, and remember: every tech support tale is a chance to bond, to laugh, and maybe to remind your quantum computing friends that even geniuses need a little help with office supplies.
And if all else fails? Tell them you’ll unjam their printer—just as soon as someone invents the remote-controlled, teleporting screwdriver.
Have you ever been asked to work tech support miracles? Share your funniest “impossible fix” stories in the comments below! And if you’re the “printer jam friend” in your group… maybe it’s time to stock up on letter-sized paper.
Original Reddit Post: Can you remotely unjam my printer