Cybersecurity Road Trips, HackRFs, and CEOs: The Wild True Tales of a Traveling Tech Consultant
Picture this: you’re on a road trip through Kansas, laptop and hacking gadgets in tow, headed to a simulated cyber crisis with high-powered execs. You’re juggling wireless investigations, dodging video calls in front of a decommissioned attack helicopter, and fielding frantic requests from sales teams who think “urgent” means “drop everything.” Sound like a fever dream? For one cybersecurity consultant—u/lawtechie on Reddit—it’s just another week on the job.
If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to be a cyber-sleuth on the move, wrangling both wifi signals and egos the size of small countries, buckle up. This story, from the epic “TalesFromTechSupport” subreddit, is a ride you won’t forget.
The Road Less Traveled (with a HackRF in the Trunk)
Our hero, a seasoned cybersecurity consultant, is en route to a tabletop exercise in rural Kansas—a simulated incident response event where bigwigs play out a cyber-attack scenario. But before the conference room drama begins, there’s road trip chaos to navigate.
First, there’s the challenge of joining a video call while parked outside a rural VFW. The problem? A giant, decommissioned attack helicopter looms in the background—hard to explain in a professional setting. But the real fun begins when Gogo and Didi, two overzealous sales colleagues (recently acquired with their own company), start blowing up our protagonist’s phone. Their mission: get a proposal written for a home automation company, right now, never mind the actual client work already on the schedule.
One coffee-flinging rage moment later (pro tip: don’t throw your coffee at your own windshield), our consultant does what any smart professional would—delegates the task to Zaynep, the true subject matter expert, and gets back to the real work.
Rain, Wifi, and the Curious Case of TrukGrindr
As the rain pours in Kansas, our protagonist stumbles upon a mysterious white tractor-trailer parked at a rest stop. The truck’s name, “TrukGrindr,” and some suspicious wifi signals have caught his attention in the past. Armed with a knockoff HackRF Portapak (“looks like if the Soviet Union made an iPod in 1974”), he attempts some spectrum analysis—only to be confronted by the truck’s driver.
His response? “I’m an influencer.” (Let’s face it, “wardriving enthusiast” doesn’t play as well on the roadside.)
Tabletop Mayhem: When CEOs Go Off-Script
Finally, it’s time for the main event: the tabletop exercise. Executives from across the VC’s portfolio are assigned roles at a fictional SaaS company, SimuKorp, and tasked with handling a data breach scenario. The cast:
- Alpha: A CEO with the energy of a motivational speaker and the subtlety of a bullhorn.
- Bravo: The CTO, master of undocumented systems.
- Charlie: Legal counsel for the simulation, but a real-world CTO who’s seen it all.
- Delta: The skeptical VC rep.
- Echo & Foxtrot: Room meat (i.e., participants who get steamrolled by louder voices).
The scenario plays out like a dark comedy: instead of following protocol, Alpha decides to handle everything alone, bypassing all the checks and balances. When called out for not taking the scenario seriously, Alpha insists, “This would never happen in the real world.” Cue Charlie, the real-life veteran, confirming that not only is the scenario realistic—it’s happened to him.
Lessons from the Field (and the Conference Room)
If there’s one thing this story hammers home, it’s the gap between theory and practice in cybersecurity. The best-laid plans and the most impressive defenses mean nothing if egos, shortcuts, or simple mistakes get in the way. Even experienced execs can fall into the trap of “it can’t happen here”—until it does.
And sometimes, the most valuable professional skill isn’t technical wizardry, but knowing when to delegate, keep your cool, and call out the elephant in the room (even if it’s a CEO in Affliction jeans).
Epilogue: Barbie’s Hacked House and Industry Aftermath
The story wraps with a few satisfying footnotes: the team’s consulting recommendations lead to real fixes at client companies; the overbearing sales team finally scores a contract with the home automation company (with Zaynep running pen tests on actual dollhouses); and “TrukGrindr” disappears into the sunset after a merger.
As for our road-weary consultant, it’s back to the highway, hoping for quieter clients and fewer caffeinated windshield mishaps.
What’s the wildest thing you’ve seen in tech support, cybersecurity, or consulting? Drop your stories below—bonus points for tales of road trips, strange wifi, or executive hubris!
(Reddit source: This is my job! I'm actually paid to do this, Conclusion)
Original Reddit Post: This is my job! I'm actually paid to do this, Conclusion