Skip to content

From Brooms to Banter: How “No-Filter Kevin” Swept Himself Out of a Job

Cartoon-style 3D illustration of a stressed employee being fired, symbolizing workplace consequences.
In this vibrant cartoon-3D illustration, we see Kevin facing the reality of job loss, a result of mounting workplace issues. His story highlights the pivotal moments that lead to his dismissal, reflecting on the importance of professional conduct.

Let’s talk about Kevin. No, not the Macaulay Culkin kind—this Kevin is a legend of a different sort, starring in a real-life workplace sitcom where the punchlines get progressively more cringe-worthy. You know the type: a coworker whose “quirky” sense of humor is really just a relentless barrage of dirty jokes, gamer rants, and a complete inability to read the room—or any room, ever.

If you’ve ever worked in customer service, you’ve probably crossed paths with a Kevin. Maybe you’ve even survived a shift with one. But few Kevins reach the next-level status of our star, who single-handedly managed to annoy, harass, and “gob gob gob” his way into unemployment at a movie theater. Let’s pop some popcorn (quietly, unlike Kevin) and dive into the greatest hits of “No Filter = No Employment Kevin.”

The Broom That Broke the Camel’s Back

Our story begins in a movie theater auditorium, where the author—let’s call her Crystal—is just trying to do her job, armed with a trusty, short broom. Why? Because as a 4’9” usher, the new long brooms are more “Excalibur” than “useful tool,” and swapping hands all shift has left her with raw, aching palms.

Enter Kevin, the self-appointed workplace comedian. After Crystal explains her broom preference, Kevin—grinning like a Sith Lord who’s just discovered the dark side—delivers his pièce de résistance:

"HAHA that's what she said."

Kevin, expecting giggles, gets nothing but a deadpan stare. Crystal, unimpressed and in real pain, tries to move on. But Kevin won’t let it go, doubling down on the “joke,” insisting it’s hilarious because of her “raw hands.” When called out, his defense is that their coworker Tray (absent, conveniently) would have found it funny too.

Spoiler: Tray’s not here, and nobody’s laughing.

If that were the end, Kevin might have survived with just a stern talking-to. But this was only the latest in a long list of offenses:

  • He’s a serial pranker—intentionally messing with coworkers’ routines, just to get a rise out of them.
  • He flipped off a customer and bragged about it at the staff BBQ (which, as far as we know, did not feature finger foods).
  • He wielded his broom like a medieval weapon, nearly decapitating coworkers, totally ignoring safety rules.
  • He interrogated everyone about their favorite lightsaber, refusing to stop until they snapped.
  • He ate snacks like Cookie Monster, making obnoxious noises just to trigger anyone nearby—especially Crystal, whose food-related trauma runs deep thanks to her sister’s own “cookie monster” performances during childhood.

And if that isn’t enough, Kevin was also fond of creeping up behind Crystal to peer at her phone, asking, “What you doing?” every five minutes—a move that’s less “friendly coworker” and more “budget mall cop.”

Why “Just Kidding” Isn’t a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free Card

Somewhere along the way, Kevin missed the memo that “That’s what she said” jokes don’t magically make pain funny—or workplace-appropriate. His inability to read social cues, stop when asked, or, you know, act like an adult, finally caught up with him.

After Crystal reported the incident (with some encouragement from her manager Brianna, who was already on Team No-Kevin), the bosses revealed a secret: Kevin had racked up so many complaints that this was the last straw. Soon after, he was ushered (pun intended) out of the building, AM and GM in tow.

The Moral of the (Kevin) Story

Every workplace has its characters, but when your “quirks” become a hazard—physically, emotionally, and gastronomically—it’s time to switch up the script. Kevin’s story is a cautionary tale for anyone who thinks “just joking” is a license to ignore boundaries or basic decency.

So, next time you’re tempted to make a questionable joke at work, maybe ask yourself: Is this funny, or am I about to become the next “Kevin” on Reddit?

Have you worked with a Kevin? Got a story that’ll make us cringe or cackle? Drop your tales of workplace woe in the comments below. Let’s commiserate over the popcorn—quietly.

TL;DR: Kevin’s “no filter” antics, dirty jokes, and snack-based trolling finally got him fired from his theater job. And honestly? The only surprise is that it didn’t happen sooner.

Original Reddit Post: No filter = no employment Kevin