Golden Arches, Greener Grass: The Petty Satisfaction of Out-McDonald’s-ing a McJerk
We’ve all been there: stuck in the drive-thru, hunger gnawing at our patience, only to watch someone else throw courtesy out the window (sometimes literally) for a shot at getting their fries faster. But what happens when karma is as quick as a McDonald’s breakfast sandwich? Today’s story from Reddit’s r/PettyRevenge dishes up a delicious tale of patience, pettiness, and poetic justice—all served with a side of hash browns.
Our hero, u/JoJoBee2256, only wanted a simple treat to fuel a day of errands. What they got instead was a close encounter with drive-thru desperation and a golden opportunity for some tasty, traffic-themed revenge.
Fast Food, Faster Fumes: When Courtesy Meets the Curb
It all started in the middle lane outside a McDonald’s. JoJoBee2256 was waiting for a safe gap to turn in—being the kind of driver who values not causing a pile-up over shaving five seconds off their commute. The woman behind them? Not so much. Impatience got the best of her as she swerved around, nearly clipping JoJoBee, and cut off both our OP and the oncoming traffic. Horns blared. Heads shook. Somewhere, a McMuffin trembled.
As u/flyinganimaga clarified in the comments, the scene was pure chaos: “Line cutter went around OP and pulled into the driveway and left her rear end sticking out into oncoming traffic because she couldn't fit all the way in. That's why oncoming traffic honked at her.” A golden moment of drive-thru drama, witnessed by all.
Drive-Thru Darwinism: Survival of the Pettiest
But here’s where fate—and a little strategic thinking—comes into play. Our OP, undeterred by the close call, waited their turn and noticed the McJerk had ended up in the longer of the two drive-thru lines. Like a seasoned McDonald’s tactician, JoJoBee quickly counted cars, zipped into the shorter line, and placed their order.
Within minutes, the tables had turned: the OP was three cars ahead, cruising past, food in hand, as the impatient driver fumed in her stalled line. As JoJoBee recounted, “As I left I honked to get her attention and waved. I have a very noticeable car and just know she knew it was me after seeing her expression as I passed by.”
And that, friends, is what the Reddit faithful call “petty satisfaction” at its finest.
Community Ketchup: When Revenge Is Best Served Hot
The r/PettyRevenge community couldn’t get enough. The top comment by u/Jboyes suggested an even spicier move: “When you are directly in front of someone like that, tell the cashier you'd like to pay it forward and pay for the order for the person behind you. Where's the petty revenge? When you get to the second window, tell them you have two orders, show both receipts, and take both orders home.” As one reply, u/LOUDCO-HD, joked, “Except for the part where you have twice as much shit food, but your greedy ass still eats all of it, and then you can't leave the house for the rest of the day because you're glued to the toilet.”
Many pointed out the practical flaws—like u/KoalaOriginal1260, who noted this would just end up punishing the staff, not the line-cutter. OP themselves chimed in, saying, “Was considering it, but she was a few cars behind me and couldn't tell which would end up being hers.” Even in pettiness, there are ethical lines!
Others shared their own drive-thru justice tales. u/Horror_File_8403 recounted a Dunkin' Donuts moment where a spot-stealer wound up waiting longer anyway, prompting a snarky exit: “How is that parking space working out for you, Honey?” There’s something universally satisfying about seeing impatience get its just desserts—especially when donuts are involved.
And for those who love a technical edge, u/Oreoscrumbs shared a pro tip: “The app really saves you time ordering, and you can get some deals/free food. My tactic is to put the order in for Drive Thru, but, if the line is long, I'll change it to the counter. By the time I park and walk in, it's ready, and then I'm usually back out and driving away before the car I was behind gets out.” In the age of mobile ordering, there’s no excuse for impatience—just smarter snacking.
Lessons from the Line: Why Patience Pays Off
So what’s the moral of this McTale? Sometimes the universe delivers swift, crispy justice—no extra salt required. As u/Original_Signal5535 observed, “I do this when I come up to a light and I am next to the asshole who zig zagged through traffic but ends up right next to me.” Whether you’re in a drive-thru or a traffic jam, impatience rarely gets you there faster. Sometimes, it just gets you spotted by the person you tried to cut off—now with a hot Egg McMuffin and a smug smile.
And if all else fails, remember u/No_Face3116’s wry observation: “I knew their coke was addictive! She really needed a fix, so it appears.” Maybe some people just need their McDonald’s more than they need manners.
So next time you’re tempted to cut the line, remember: the fries might be fast, but karma is faster.
Have a story of your own petty revenge? Share it in the comments, or just tell us your favorite menu hack for outsmarting the drive-thru. After all, the best revenge is served hot—and sometimes with a side of hash browns.
Original Reddit Post: She NEEDED McDonald's