Green Beer, Bad Management, and the Night Audit From Hell: Surviving St. Patrick’s Day at the Chaotic Charriott
There are wild nights at hotels, and then there’s working the front desk of a swanky downtown property on St. Patrick’s Day—solo. Picture it: the city pulses with green-clad revelers, the bars burst at the seams, and by 2 a.m., the entire party stumbles straight toward your lobby. It's a recipe for mayhem, and for one unlucky night auditor, it would become the stuff of legend (and, eventually, sweet Reddit catharsis).
If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to be the lone line of defense between a luxury hotel and an invading army of drunken club-goers, buckle up. This isn’t just a cautionary tale—it’s a masterclass in why hospitality workers deserve medals (and maybe hazard pay).
The Swanky Charriott: Where Management Goes to Die
Our protagonist, u/chaitealatte5, took the night audit gig at “the Charriott” hoping for a low-key, restorative job. Instead, she landed in a revolving-door circus of managers (four in nine months!), high turnover, and a communication strategy that might best be described as “shrug emoji.”
The scene: Five bars within stumbling distance. A hotel with a lobby that becomes ground zero for every tipsy patron seeking shelter, snacks, or a restroom to destroy. And management? They’re MIA, except to schedule mandatory meetings during your sleep hours—because who needs REM when you’ve got guest complaints?
Security Guard or Lobby Furniture? You Decide
Enter the security guard, a man so dedicated to his phone that he makes the couch cushions look busy. His “job” was to vet guests, patrol the property, and generally keep things safe. In practice, he was more of a stationary observer, offering blank stares and asking clarifying questions like, “Should I stop the shirtless guys fighting on floor three?” (Spoiler: Yes. That is literally your job.)
With security on permanent snooze mode, our night auditor was left to play bouncer, referee, and crisis negotiator, all while keeping the snack bar safe from snack wolves.
St. Patrick’s Day: The Shamrock Shakedown
On that fateful holiday, the hotel was fully booked, the bars were full, and the lobby was a living, breathing episode of “COPS.” The author’s only ally, a coworker (shoutout to L!), stayed an hour past their shift—then it was just our hero, the “security” guard, and a parade of increasingly creative attempts to buy beer after hours (including bribes and the old “the GM said it’s okay” routine).
At 2 a.m., the real fun began. Guests and non-guests alike surged through the doors, some forcing them open, others trying to check in for tomorrow’s reservation by arguing that “after midnight counts as today!” (Pro tip: It doesn’t. Hotel systems are weird, but not that weird.)
When denied, one couple went from “confused” to “combative,” with the would-be guest escalating to threats and even trying to fight the (still-seated) security guard. Amid the chaos, insults flew (“pussy, bitch, liar”—the classics), and the author had to barricade herself in the back office and call the police (who, in a plot twist worthy of a sitcom, never showed).
Management (Finally) Gets a Wake-Up Call
For months, our night auditor had begged management for a new security guard, documenting every incident—only to be told the problem wasn’t real. That night, she called her manager to witness the disaster firsthand. The response? “Wow! … I never really believed you until I saw it for my own eyes tonight.”
Validation at last—if only it hadn’t required a St. Paddy’s Day meltdown, multiple threats, and heroic levels of patience.
A Bittersweet Farewell
Not all was misery: one previously grumpy guest apologized and handed over a $20 bill, proof that humanity can shine through even on the roughest nights.
Two months later, our hero was poached by a manager from another property (who, naturally, also hated the GM). No more herding drunks or dodging threats with tire irons—just the usual hospitality headaches.
The Real Lesson from the Front Desk
This isn’t just a wild hotel tale—it’s a reminder that front desk jobs aren’t just about checking people in with a smile. It’s crisis management, crowd control, and customer service on hard mode. And sometimes, the only thing standing between chaos and order is a tired, underappreciated night auditor determined not to let the St. Patrick’s Day madness win.
Have your own Tales from the Front Desk? Or maybe you have a nightmare guest story to share? Drop it in the comments—after all, misery (and green beer) loves company.
Want more insane hospitality stories? Smash that share button, and let’s raise a glass to the unsung heroes behind the desk—may your security guards be alert and your managers actually listen!
Original Reddit Post: The St. Patrick’s Day That Broke The Auditor’s Back