How Glitter Became the Ultimate Petty Revenge Weapon Against a Terrible Boss
There are bad bosses, and then there are boss-level villains—the kind who make you question reality, your self-worth, and whether you should have just run away to join the circus. But what if, after years of enduring condescending comments, micro-management, and soul-sapping manipulation, you could walk out in a blaze of sparkling, low-key glory? Enter the hero of today’s story: u/thatfishbish, who weaponized glitter for the most satisfying, petty revenge.
If you’ve ever fantasized about getting back at a boss who made your life miserable, you’ll want to sit back and savor this tale of “decorative herpes” and poetic justice.
Glitter: The Shimmering Symbol of Petty Revenge
For six long years, our protagonist endured a toxic workplace ruled by a boss who seemed to have memorized the entire “How to Ruin Employee Morale” manual. Like so many of us, they stayed because the job was a financial lifeline and, ironically, a source of professional growth—just not the healthy kind. As the de facto senior staff member (read: underpaid workhorse with a fancy title), u/thatfishbish learned that some bosses are less “leaders” and more “villains in a soap opera you can’t turn off.”
When the day of liberation finally arrived, a simple, dramatic exit wasn’t enough. After all, this boss had a penchant for litigation—so nothing overtly vengeful would do. No, the best revenge had to be subtle, deniable, and… glittery.
The “Thank You” Card That Keeps on Giving (and Giving and Giving)
Picture the scene: a thank you card so dazzling it could blind a magpie, brimming with the kind of ultra-fine glitter that defies the laws of physics. This wasn’t just any card; it was the glitter bomb of greeting cards, the kind that would make even a unicorn regret opening it indoors.
With a perfectly professional, insincerely heartfelt message, the card was left on the absent boss’s desk. No one suspects the thank you card, right? It’s the Trojan Horse of the stationery world. But this was no olive branch—it was a time-release curse. A curse of sparkles.
Weeks, months, and even years later, the glitter remains. As u/thatfishbish’s former colleague reported, they’re still finding specks of it lurking in the office corners. It’s the gift that keeps on giving: a tiny, persistent reminder that sometimes, karma comes in fabulous shades of gold and silver.
Why Glitter Is the Perfect Petty Weapon
If you’ve never experienced a true glitter disaster, let me paint a picture: the stuff is basically immortal. It clings to your skin like an ex’s bad memories, travels on your clothes, and colonizes every surface within a three-meter blast radius. Once unleashed, you’ll find it years later in places you never imagined—like a sparkly breadcrumb trail of your former life choices.
That’s why it’s earned the nickname “the herpes of the craft world.” There’s no cure. There is only acceptance.
So, for anyone plotting their own small act of justice (and let’s be honest, who hasn’t?), glitter is a masterstroke. It’s harmless, deniable, and wonderfully inconvenient. No lawsuit can stick, but the glitter will—forever.
Petty? Sure. Satisfying? Absolutely.
Let’s be clear: quitting a toxic job is the real victory. But a little extra sparkle on your way out? That’s the cherry on top.
Stories like this resonate because we’ve all fantasized about the perfect last laugh. The beauty here is in the subtlety. There’s no grand confrontation, no risky sabotage—just a simple, sparkly thank you that will haunt a terrible boss for years to come. Sometimes, the best revenge is one that’s both hilarious and utterly trivial.
Your Turn: What’s Your Petty Revenge?
Do you have a glittery grudge or a story of sweet, subtle payback? Would you dare to unleash “decorative herpes” on your own office nemesis? Drop your stories in the comments below! And remember: revenge is a dish best served sparkly.
If you enjoyed this tale, don’t forget to share it with your favorite office escapee—or that friend who just can’t quit the group chat drama. Because everyone deserves a little inspiration for their own petty masterpiece.
Sources: - Original Reddit post by u/thatfishbish
Revenge is temporary, but glitter is forever.
Original Reddit Post: A heartfelt thank you for ruining my mental health - enjoy your ‘decorative herpes’.