How We Outsmarted an Internet Creep Into Snorting Baking Soda: Wild Tales from the Wild West of Early Online Chat
Ah, the late '90s—the golden era when the internet was a lawless frontier and chatrooms were digital saloons. Before usernames came with two-factor authentication and every click left a digital footprint, you could wander into a chatroom, pick a nickname, and mingle with strangers from around the globe. But with that freedom came the creeps: those who thrived in anonymity, whispering unsavory messages to unsuspecting users, especially young women.
But what happens when the hunted become the hunters? Let me take you on a hilarious, jaw-dropping ride through one of the most creative acts of digital justice you’ve (probably) never heard of: The time a couple of clever chatroom warriors convinced an internet creep to inhale a “DIY cocaine” recipe made from baking soda and vanilla sugar. Spoiler: It didn’t end well for the creep—but it’s a story that’ll make you cheer for the good guys.
The Wild, Wild Web: No Moderators, No Rules… No Problem?
To set the scene, let’s rewind to 1999. Picture a world before Facebook, TikTok, or even MySpace. HTML chatrooms ruled supreme, where the only barrier to entry was dreaming up a nickname. Moderation was non-existent. No bots, no admins—just you, your words, and a sea of total strangers.
It was a breeding ground for all sorts—funny folks, lonely hearts, and, unfortunately, the persistent digital creeps. With no registration and no logs, you could be anyone. And that’s why communities like “The Attic” formed: self-moderated sanctuaries where users banded together for safety, support, and the occasional coordinated troll-fest against troublemakers.
Enter the Creep: Farmer Bob
Every good revenge story needs a villain. Enter Farmer Bob—a smooth-talking, wooden-shoe-wearing, self-proclaimed cattle baron who turned out to be a low-key, persistent creep. He slipped past the usual defenses and started pestering younger members with unsavory emails. That’s when our heroes—one clever guy and his girlfriend, notorious in the chatroom for her devilish creativity—decided enough was enough.
The plan? Classic catfishing with a twist. The girlfriend pretended to be a naïve newbie, stringing Farmer Bob along and gathering enough personal intel to confirm he was, in fact, a world-class idiot. He boasted about his wealth, forgot his lies mid-conversation (oops, those “parents” he lived with suddenly owned his “farm”), and bragged about his supposed sexual prowess in wooden clogs. Charming.
The Revenge: Snort, Rinse, Repeat
Here’s where the story goes from classic trolling to pro-level revenge. The girlfriend played the ultimate bait: she’d only consider meeting up if Farmer Bob could provide some cocaine—because, you know, that’s what gets her “in the mood.” Farmer Bob, now desperate, admitted he couldn’t afford it. So she hit him with a fake recipe: “Just mix three parts baking soda with one part vanilla sugar for a cocaine-like rush!”
Surely, you’d think, even a creep would see through this. But Farmer Bob? Nope. He fell for it, thanked her for the “DIY cocaine” tip, and promised to whip up a batch. Days later, the couple received an all-caps email rage-fest: “YOU MADE MY NOSE BLEED, YOU MF B**CH! I HAD TO VISIT A CLINIC BECAUSE OF YOU!!!”
But wait—there’s more! The girlfriend doubled down, insisting he must have mixed it wrong, and spun a wild yarn about starring in German amateur spanking pornos, all fueled by her magic “nose candy.” To “prove” it, they shot a gloriously fake (and side-splittingly bad) trailer: her younger brother, his friend, a wooden spatula, and some truly awful German gibberish.
Farmer Bob bought it—hook, line, and sinker. He begged to buy the films and agreed to try the fake cocaine again. After that, he vanished from their lives (and inboxes), presumably wiser and with a very sore nose.
Lessons from the Digital Frontier
This story is more than just schadenfreude. It’s a time capsule from the dawn of the internet, when users had to invent their own justice and community rules. While today’s web is heavily moderated (for better or worse), there’s something to be said for the creativity and camaraderie forged in those early digital days.
So, next time you’re frustrated by a troll or an online creep, remember: sometimes, the best revenge is a blend of teamwork, quick wit, and a box of Arm & Hammer.
What’s Your Best Internet Justice Story?
Did you ever have to serve up some digital justice? Share your tales of online trickery and triumph in the comments! And if you want more wild stories from the internet’s untamed past, hit that subscribe button. The wild west of the web may be gone, but its legends live on.
Inspired by the original story from u/Candid_Umpire6418 on r/ProRevenge. Read the full tale here.
Original Reddit Post: The story when me and my (ex-gf) tricked an internet creep into snorting baking soda