Rolling With the Worst: A Night Auditor’s Tale of “Mike” and the Front Desk from Hell
If you think working the night shift at a hotel is all free coffee and quiet lobbies, allow me to introduce you to Mike—a recurring guest who redefined awful. From sexual harassment to racist tirades, Mike’s visits were less “business traveler” and more “walking HR violation.” But this isn’t just a tale of one hotel worker’s endurance; it’s a window into the wild world of front desk life, complete with the best (and worst) humanity has to offer—and a Reddit community more than ready to pile on.
Ready to cringe, laugh, and maybe send a sympathy card? Let’s roll in the hay with the worst guest ever.
Welcome to the Front Desk: Where the Customer Is Not Always Right
Meet Mike: a hay-hauling, livestock-toting regular whose entrance line—"You want to go roll in the hay with me?"—set the tone for everything to follow. For our night auditor hero (let’s call her Bats), this was the start of a saga that would test every ounce of professionalism.
Bats, seasoned by years of night shifts and a stint as a college bouncer, deployed the classic customer service smile and tried to steer the conversation back to the business at hand. But Mike, evidently immune to both subtlety and decency, doubled down. It was, as u/sirentropy42 quipped in the comments, “exactly the sort of person who is going to wind up on DNR [Do Not Rent] given enough chances.”
And oh, were there chances.
The Many Faces of Mike: Racism, Rudeness, and a Masterclass in Entitlement
Mike was the sort of guest who didn’t just make awkward passes; he made everyone around him uncomfortable. When he insulted the hotel’s houseman—an actual sweetheart and Vietnam vet—by suggesting he looked homeless, Bats called him out. Mike’s response? An absolutely wild (and wildly wrong) claim that “it’s legal to kill homeless people in Canada.” The Reddit crowd was quick to pounce—u/TararaBoomDA (a self-identified Canadian) debunked it with, “Because it is NOT legal to kill the homeless in Canada or anywhere else.”
Another commenter, u/MightyManorMan, clarified for the crowd: the law Mike was likely butchering refers to MAID (Medical Assistance in Dying), a complex and humane process that has “absolutely nothing to do” with homelessness.
But Mike wasn’t done. From demanding check-ins after hours and berating staff over his own reservation blunders (“I forgot to hit enter,” he admitted—ironically, the only moment of self-awareness in the saga), to throwing coffee in a fit of rage when finally refused service, Mike was a one-man wrecking ball of bad behavior.
The community had thoughts. Colorful ones. u/kevnmartin wished upon Mike “a gigantic boil in his ass and his nose falls off,” to which u/Saint_fartina cheerfully replied: “Syphilis enters the chat.” u/SkwrlTail, meanwhile, hoped Mike would “step on a Lego every. single. day.” It’s the kind of solidarity only hospitality workers—and anyone who’s ever dealt with a Mike—can truly appreciate.
The Breaking Point: Standing Up and the Power of “Do Not Rent”
For months, Bats endured Mike’s harassment, racism, and general awfulness, believing she just had to put up with it. But as u/sirentropy42 pointed out, “Private businesses have every right to refuse service to anyone, especially on grounds of harassment.” The wisdom of Maya Angelou—“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time”—echoed through the thread.
Finally, after one coffee-throwing, profanity-laced meltdown too many, Bats did what so many commenters had been rooting for: she told Mike to leave, put him on the Do Not Rent list, and watched as management (and even corporate) backed her up. The best part? Mike’s parting shot—a review calling her “snotty” and “uppity”—only made the victory sweeter.
As u/MrStormChaser summed up: “He should’ve been DNR’ed long before that. F#ck Mike.”
Community Wisdom: Why Front Desk Workers Deserve Medals (and Hazard Pay)
The story of Mike is more than just a cathartic rant—it’s a rallying cry for anyone who’s worked behind a counter. The Reddit community, with its mix of humor, empathy, and righteous fury, brought out the real lesson: No one should have to endure harassment or hate just to do their job.
u/joysteinkraus (a seasoned traveler) offered a supportive perspective: “The people at the front desk have always bent over backwards to help out… They kind of looked out for me.” Others, like u/OxygenThief7, suggested Mike deserved an endless supply of telemarketers, insurance brokers, and home improvement specialists—justice, Reddit-style.
And while some commenters debated whether Bats should have DNR’ed Mike earlier, the overwhelming consensus was clear: No more rolling in the hay for creeps. Good riddance.
Conclusion: The Night Audit Never Sleeps
Bats’s saga is a reminder of the weird, wild, and occasionally wonderful world of hospitality, where every shift could bring a Mike—or, with luck, a month and a half without one. Next time you check into a hotel, spare a kind word for the night auditor on duty. They’ve probably seen more humanity (and inhumanity) than you can imagine.
Have a tale of your own “Mike”? Or a story of sweet, sweet front desk revenge? Share it in the comments—because if there’s one thing the internet loves, it’s a bad guest getting what’s coming to them.
And to Mike, wherever you are: May your hay stay lumpy and your coffee cold.
What’s the worst guest you’ve ever encountered—or survived? Let’s hear your best (or worst) hospitality horror stories!
Original Reddit Post: A Roll In The Hay