“Sorry, Do I Know You?”: The Savviest Petty Revenge at a Class Reunion
There’s something magical (or maybe masochistic) about high school reunions. For one night, you get to see who’s thriving, who’s surviving, and who’s still peddling questionable investment schemes. But every so often, someone pulls off a moment of perfectly subtle, deliciously petty revenge that becomes the stuff of legend.
That’s exactly what happened to Reddit user u/Fasterandfaster-2000’s best friend “John” at their 25th high school reunion—a story that has the internet cheering, cringing, and maybe even taking notes for their next class get-together.
The Reunion: Old Friends, New Grifts
The stage: A small college prep school where, with just 72 students in their graduating class, everyone knew everyone—or so you’d think. Fast forward a couple of decades, and John has built a wildly successful company, raised millions for charity, and even spearheaded the construction of a STEM center that now bears his name. He’s the kind of local celebrity you spot in the alumni newsletter and, if you’re lucky, at your high school reunion.
Enter Tom: the classic high school jerk, less bully and more garden-variety pest. Tom’s post-grad journey could be described as “serial entrepreneur,” but only if you squint really hard and ignore the part where he bounced from white rapper to used car salesman to mortgage-fraud-adjacent real estate “guru,” and now, crypto bro extraordinaire. (You can practically smell the pyramid scheme through the screen.)
Crypto, Clout, and Comeuppance
At the reunion, John plays host at his sprawling home, content to relax with old friends on the patio. Tom, however, comes strutting over, ready to peddle his latest crypto “opportunity.” He launches into a pitch before John can even finish his drink.
But John, ever the class act, hits him with the most devastating line in the petty revenge playbook: “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch who you are here with. Is your wife one of our classmates?”
Ouch. In a single, polite sentence, John manages to reduce Tom to a mere plus-one, not even worthy of a spot on the mental guest list. Tom sputters, “No man! I’m Tom. We were classmates! Don’t you remember I used to razz you?”
John, channeling all the energy of an Oscar-winning performance, shrugs and replies, “Not really. I think I have a pretty good memory of our class, but I don’t remember you at all.”
What follows is a masterclass in social jiu-jitsu. John signals the event planner to “verify” Tom’s invitation, just to be sure. Tom is escorted away, flustered and fuming, while John gives his buddies a wink and delivers the line of the night: “It’s unfortunate, I have to be careful.”
Why This Snub Works So Well
Was John being a little petty? Sure. But this was no high school payback brawl. This was a seasoned, grown-up “I don’t have time for your nonsense” move delivered with velvet gloves. John didn’t call out Tom’s past pranks, nor did he launch into a tirade about “success.” He simply erased Tom from memory—a fate worse than a public roast for a serial self-promoter craving attention.
What makes this story so satisfying is the contrast: John’s understated, genuine accomplishments versus Tom’s desperate, performative hustle. After years of Tom’s irritating antics and shameless self-promotion, John’s “Who are you again?” is the ultimate power move. It’s the kind of comeback you dream about in the shower for years, but rarely get to deliver.
The Sweetest Revenge Is Living Well—and Selective Amnesia
When Tom returned, reinforced by the classmate who organized the reunion, John didn’t waver. “I’m sorry, sometimes people just fail to leave an impression on me. I hope you enjoy my home and have a lovely weekend.” And with that, he was off to check on the “important people”—the kids running around the backyard, not the grown-up children still chasing clout.
It’s a reminder that the best revenge isn’t about shouting your achievements from the rooftops or outshining your rivals. Sometimes, it’s simply moving on, refusing to let past nuisances rent space in your head—or your guest list.
Let’s Hear Your Best Reunion Stories!
Have you ever delivered (or witnessed) a perfectly timed, subtle snub? Or did your last high school reunion devolve into a crypto pitch war? Drop your juiciest reunion tales, epic comebacks, or petty victories in the comments below!
Because sometimes, the best way to deal with the Toms of the world is to simply forget they ever existed.
Original Reddit Post: “I have no idea who you are.” At class reunion