The Day Olive Oil Became a Weapon of Petty Revenge at the Supermarket
Have you ever been wronged in a supermarket and dreamed of serving up a delicious dish of instant karma? Well, one New Zealander, known as u/FluffWit on Reddit, recently turned a mundane grocery run into a masterclass in petty revenge. Their tale, posted to r/PettyRevenge, involves an early-morning milk run, a rude shopper with a mean trolley game, and, of all things, a bottle of Extra Virgin Olive Oil wielded with Shakespearean flair.
It’s the kind of story that makes you want to cheer, cringe, and maybe reconsider how you treat your fellow shoppers in the dairy aisle.
The Scene: Wide Aisles, Short Tempers
Picture this: It’s 9 AM on a Tuesday, and you’re gliding through the blissfully empty aisles of a New Zealand Pak N Save. The only thing wider than the aisles is the space between you and other shoppers—at least, in theory. As our protagonist reaches for some milk, a stranger rams them with a trolley. Not a polite “Oops, sorry!”—just a cold, vacant death stare. Classic supermarket villain behavior.
Our hero, embodying the Kiwi spirit of non-confrontation, lets it slide. After all, maybe the person doesn’t speak English, or maybe it was just a bad morning. No harm, no foul, right? Well, the universe had other plans.
Enter: The Olive Oil Dilemma
Minutes later, fate (and the grocery list) lead both parties to the oil aisle. “Excuse me,” the trolley-wielding antagonist says, pointing at a bottle of olive oil perched high on the shelf—far out of reach. The audacity! Not only did this person fail to offer an apology for their earlier trolley crime, but now they’re expecting help? The drama!
Our hero keeps it classy, asking, “Virgin or Extra Virgin?” After the request is made, the moment of reckoning arrives. Bottle in hand, they turn and say, “You realize I’m the guy you hit with your trolley two minutes ago, right?”
Cue jaw-drop. Cue silence. Cue the ultimate power move: “I am not helping you unless you apologize.” The bottle hovers tantalizingly out of reach as the seconds tick by, before being returned to the shelf with a flourish. Our protagonist walks away, leaving their foe to stew in the consequences of their rudeness.
Why Does This Petty Revenge Resonate So Much?
There’s a reason this story racked up thousands of upvotes and hundreds of comments—because it taps into something universal. Who among us hasn’t fantasized about a perfect, poetic comeback to life’s little indignities? In a world where big gestures are rare and justice often seems out of reach, it’s the tiny, satisfying victories that make us feel like we’re winning.
Plus, there’s something inherently hilarious about using olive oil as a bargaining chip for an apology. It’s the supermarket equivalent of holding someone’s cookies hostage until they admit they double-dipped in the hummus.
The Importance of Everyday Kindness (and Apologies)
At its core, this tale is about respect and the small social contracts that keep civilization humming. A simple “sorry” can turn a tense moment into a forgettable blip. But without it, you risk being denied your Extra Virgin Olive Oil—and, let’s face it, possibly your dignity.
The story also highlights just how satisfying it can be to stand up for yourself in small, clever ways. No yelling, no drama—just a well-timed reminder that manners matter, especially in the land of wide aisles and polite shoppers.
Supermarket Etiquette: A Quick Refresher
Let’s take a moment to remember the unwritten rules of grocery shopping:
- Apologize if you bump someone’s trolley (or person).
- Acknowledge people who help you reach the top shelf.
- Save the death stares for bad reality TV, not the dairy section.
- And, above all, don’t mess with someone who knows how to wield a bottle of olive oil.
Have You Ever Served Petty Revenge?
So next time you’re strolling through your local supermarket, keep your wits—and your manners—about you. You never know when you might star in someone else’s story of subtle, satisfying justice.
Have you ever been part of a supermarket standoff, or delivered your own dose of petty revenge? Share your best (or worst) stories in the comments below. And don’t forget: kindness is free, but sometimes, so is a little bit of payback.
Happy shopping, and may your olive oil always be within reach!
Original Reddit Post: Teased a short person at the Supermarket by holding something just out of reach