The Great Toilet Paper Wars: How One Tech Office Fought Back Against Bathroom Invaders
We’ve all heard stories of passive-aggressive notes in the office kitchen, but what happens when the battleground shifts to the bathrooms? Imagine working hard to keep your space clean and civilized, only to have your less-than-hygienic neighbors sneak in and ransack your toilet paper stash—again and again. Well, one tech office had enough, and the result is an epic tale of petty revenge, blue toilet paper, and one very creative padlock solution.
Bathroom Bandits: An Office Outrage
Let’s set the scene. Your friend owns a tech company. He rents office space in a building with several other companies. Like any decent employer, he pays for cleaning staff to keep his slice of the workplace sparkling—including the bathrooms. But not everyone in the building shares his commitment to hygiene.
Downstairs, another company lets their restrooms become a biohazard zone, the kind of place you’d only enter if you’d lost a bet. Rather than face the horror of their own facilities, these bathroom bandits decide to ascend to the cleaner, fresher (and well-stocked) restrooms of the tech company upstairs. Not only do they leave a mess, but they also devour every last square of toilet paper—and, as the story goes, have the audacity to pilfer a blue roll that a fed-up employee brought from home!
Enough Is Enough: The Rise of the Petty Avenger
Enter our hero: a coworker pushed to his breaking point. Imagine the indignity! Not only must you bring your own TP to work, but some rogue visitor steals it and smuggles it back downstairs. The blue color gives it away—there’s no mistaking whose roll it was.
Rather than suffer in silence, this office avenger hatches a plan worthy of a sitcom. He sneaks into the offending company’s bathroom and steals every roll of toilet paper he can find. But he doesn’t stop there. Oh no. He also installs a padlock on his own company’s bathroom—and, in a beautiful twist of poetic justice, on the bathroom of the offending company as well.
The Padlock Gambit: Petty or Perfectly Justified?
Let’s be honest: few things unite coworkers more than a common enemy and a shared inconvenience. The Reddit thread where this story appeared (shoutout to u/canthavepieimsorry) quickly filled with supportive comments and laughter. Who hasn’t fantasized about some petty revenge at work? The padlock maneuver is both hilarious and, in a way, entirely reasonable—after all, if you can’t respect shared resources, you lose the privilege.
But what makes this story so delightful is the clever escalation. Instead of a confrontational email or a tense face-to-face, our protagonist lets the offenders discover their own comeuppance: locked out of their own (already gross) bathrooms, with no toilet paper to be found anywhere. Monday morning is going to be… interesting, to say the least.
Office Etiquette, or Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
Beyond the laughs, there’s a real lesson here about shared spaces. Offices are microcosms of society, and the bathroom—the most basic of amenities—can quickly become a flashpoint for conflict. Is it so hard to clean up after yourself? To buy some extra toilet paper when you see it’s running low? Yet all it takes is one inconsiderate neighbor to tip the balance from harmony to anarchy.
This story is a reminder that sometimes, the only way to restore order is a little bit of clever, well-timed pettiness. If nothing else, it ensures everyone will be a bit more mindful about respecting boundaries (and bathrooms) in the future.
How Would You Handle a Bathroom Bandit?
So, dear reader: have you ever faced the horror of an office bathroom invader? Did you plot your own petty revenge, or did you let it slide? Share your best (or worst!) stories below—because sometimes, the best part of work is swapping tales of the battles we fight outside the boardroom.
Who knows? Your solution might just inspire the next great petty hero. And if not, at least we can all agree: respect the bathroom, respect the TP, and for goodness’ sake, don’t make your coworkers bring their own rolls.
Let’s keep it clean out there, folks. Or at least… let’s keep it interesting.
Original Reddit Post: Downstairs company using our bathrooms.