“This Isn’t America!”: Hilarious Tales from a Border Hotel Where Guests Forget They’ve Crossed a Country
If you’ve ever worked front desk at a hotel near an international border, you know: some guests don’t just bring their luggage—they bring their expectations of home, even when home is hundreds of miles (or a whole country) away. One Redditor from r/TalesFromTheFrontDesk, u/DianthaAJ, recently shared their hilarious and exasperating tales from a not-so-American hotel, where guests routinely forget that, no, Toto, you’re not in Kansas anymore (or even in the U.S. at all).
The resulting post is pure comedic gold, but also a gentle (okay, sometimes not-so-gentle) reminder: before you cross a border, maybe brush up on…well, everything.
“Why Don’t You Have [Insert American Chain Here]?”
Imagine working at the front desk, only to be asked—again—where the nearest [famous American fast food chain] is. The answer? “500kms away.” That’s not a typo. Five. Hundred. Kilometers. Yet, the hopeful glimmer in the traveler’s eye persists, as if a hidden drive-thru will magically appear next to the maple trees and foreign road signs.
It’s not just the fast food, either. The Redditor laments: “No I can't make FOX appear, it’s not on our cable package (thank god).” Sorry, folks, but the local TV lineup probably looks a little different—and unless you’re in the mood for curling or French-language soap operas, you might need to adjust your viewing habits.
The Rules Aren’t the Same—And That’s Kind of the Point
Here’s where things get really interesting. “No, we don’t adhere to ADA regulations—but we do adhere to local handicap rules.” Accessibility laws vary from country to country, but for some travelers, this is news. Likewise, the drinking age: “No, the drinking age isn’t 21. It’s 18.” You’d think younger guests would be thrilled, but some American travelers have apparently made it their mission to enforce U.S. laws on foreign soil, pressuring local guests to leave the bar for being “underage.” Talk about taking “When in Rome” and flipping it on its head!
Speaking of foreign currency: “No, our vending machines do not take USD.” Yes, even the humble vending machine recognizes borders, even if your wallet—or your sense of geography—doesn’t.
Is It the Border? Is It the Weather? Is It…Just Us?
So why does this happen so often? The original poster wonders: “Is it the land border? People just driving up without realizing it’s another country entirely?” There’s something uniquely surreal about border towns. One moment you’re in the U.S., the next you’re in Canada (or Mexico), but some folks are still convinced their American cell service should work, their favorite soda should be on every menu, and all local laws should bend to their expectations.
Maybe it’s the ease of crossing a border by car—the absence of a dramatic passport stamp, or the fact that the air smells pretty much the same. But for the folks working the front desk, the reminders are constant, sometimes baffling, and often hilarious.
A Friendly PSA: When Traveling, Do Your Homework
While it’s easy to poke fun (and let’s be honest, these stories are comedy gold), there’s a lesson here: check the basics before you travel. What’s the currency? The local laws? The TV channels? The drinking age? You don’t want to be that person arguing about ADA regulations in a country where they don’t apply, or searching in vain for a vending machine that accepts your crumpled dollars.
For the rest of us, these tales are a reminder of the joy—and absurdity—of travel. No, you can’t get FOX on every TV, and no, the vending machine isn’t a closet exchange bureau. But you just might discover something new and delightful if you embrace where you are, instead of pining for where you left.
So, Next Time You Cross a Border…
Take a deep breath. Try the local snacks. Learn the rules. And above all, be kind to your front desk staff—they’re the real heroes, patiently explaining, once again, that yes, this really isn’t America.
Have you ever had a travel mishap because you forgot the local rules? Share your funniest (or most embarrassing) cross-border moments in the comments below! And if you’ve worked a border hotel front desk, we want to hear your wildest stories, too.
Happy travels—and don’t forget your passport (and your sense of humor)!
Original Reddit Post: This isn't america!