When Speed Gets Punished: How a Company’s Backwards Policy Inspired the Ultimate Petty Revenge
Ever been so good at your job that your boss decides to pay you less? No, this isn’t a plot twist in an episode of The Office—it’s the real-life saga of one employee who found out that blazing through tasks at lightning speed could actually shrink their paycheck. Welcome to the upside-down world of “punishing productivity,” where working smarter, not harder, gets you a slap on the wrist (and the wallet).
This story, originally shared by Reddit user u/VampArcher on r/PettyRevenge, reveals what happens when a company tries to squeeze more out of its workers by rewarding mediocrity and penalizing hustle. Spoiler: it backfires in the most gloriously petty way possible.
When Efficiency Becomes the Enemy
Let’s set the stage. Our protagonist had a dream gig for anyone who values autonomy: assigned a geographical zone, responsible for hitting deadlines within a generous time limit, making their own schedule, and getting paid mileage. The job even featured a remote supervisor who never looked over their shoulder. Sounds like paradise, right?
But there was a catch. Each task came with a padded time estimate—often two hours for something an experienced worker could finish in ten minutes. The unwritten rule from management was: “Claim the full time for payroll. It’s only fair that the go-getters aren’t punished for their competence.” Sensible enough. After all, why penalize someone for being efficient?
Unfortunately, paradise was short-lived. Enter new management, stage left, wielding a policy straight out of the “How to Demotivate Your Workforce 101” handbook: employees now had to either take the entire allotted time for each task or stomach a pay cut. In other words, if you zipped through a job in thirty minutes, you’d only get paid for thirty minutes—never mind that the slackers still got the full two hours for the same task.
Petty Revenge: Clocking In, Tuning Out
Faced with this Kafkaesque logic, our hero, along with colleagues across different cities, did what any rational, slightly miffed employee would do: they ran the clock. Task finished in a quarter of the time? Fantastic—cue a leisurely stroll through the grocery store, a relaxed lunch, a bit of light reading, and a scroll through social media. After all, if the company was going to insist on paying for time rather than results, why not fill that time with a little personal productivity?
It’s the corporate equivalent of “you want me to look busy? I’ll look so busy you’ll wonder if I’m still alive.” The result? Workers disengaged, morale tanked, and the company’s attempt to “save money” by punishing efficiency ended up costing them in lost productivity and, eventually, talent. (Spoiler: our Redditor quit, and management begged them to stay. The ultimate power move? Ghosting them for good.)
Why Companies Should Never Punish Productivity
This tale is as hilarious as it is maddening. It’s also a lesson in why companies should never, ever incentivize mediocrity. When you penalize workers for being efficient, you don’t magically squeeze more value out of them. Instead, you encourage clock-watching, disengagement, and—yes—petty revenge.
Think about it: would you want to work somewhere that rewards you for dragging your feet and punishes you for getting things done? Of course not. The best workplaces recognize and reward efficiency, giving employees the freedom to use their skills to the fullest—and maybe even go home early when the job’s done.
But when management gets it wrong, employees will always find a way to balance the scales, even if it means spending company time reading the latest Reddit drama in the grocery store parking lot.
The Moral of the Story (and Why We Love Petty Revenge)
There’s a reason stories like this rack up thousands of upvotes and hundreds of comments. We all love a good tale of an underdog fighting back with wit and subtle rebellion. It’s cathartic to see someone stand up to a system that doesn’t make sense—and win, even if it’s just by doing their grocery shopping on the clock.
So next time your company dreams up a new “productivity” measure, remember: treat your workers like adults, reward their efficiency, and never, ever punish someone for being good at their job. Otherwise, you might just find your entire workforce perfecting the art of looking busy—while getting nothing done.
Have you experienced a “punish the productive” policy at work? Or pulled off your own petty revenge? Share your story in the comments below!
Meta Description:
Discover how one worker turned a ridiculous pay-cut policy into the perfect act of petty revenge—and why punishing efficiency never pays.
Original Reddit Post: My job cut people's pay for getting tasks completed too fast so everyone ran the clock